I still need my heroes

Let me start by saying that it really bothers me that I don't have many women heroes.
What I mean to say is my mother was my first female hero (I don't have a video to show you)
I have a niece who I would call a hero, but I don't want to embarrass her more than she will be if she ends up reading this.

I will start with Catherine Asaro. She's multi talented and writes a great Sci Fi Book.

What makes her my hero is her champion the more realistic side of her genre and still being able to sing a good song and argue theoretical physics like imaginary numbers and be right about all of it without the need to teabag her opponents. Grace under fire.

Ursula K. le Guin (might have her name wrong) who is still the most awesome writer in my experience because she gave me Ged and the Earthsea which is one of the very few books that have remained my favorite through out my entire life. She is and will always be my hero.

I have actually met this hero, back when he was just some guy writing Sandman and before I would hold him up as someone I wanted to be more like for his views on life and fiction and all the things and imaginings and outlook that would shape me as a writer. He is both the humor and amazing imagination that I find loving in my own fictions.

Bill Nye didn't start out as my favorite Science guy but after he retired as the Science Guy, I found that I really had liked him and science and then when he resurfaced under the Planetary Society and endorsed my brother- he became forever elevated as the voice of reasonable reason in this wild and unscientific world.

Neil DeGrasse Tyson is by far the coolest smart guy in the universe and I like that I agree with him on most things about science and fiction and doing a good job at whatever he sets his mind and effort too. I love that he never forgets what is really important to him (astronomy) and that Space Zombie Aliens could happen.

And Carl Sagan who would transform the small universe of my mind into the limitless hope and ambition that would change how I wrote about the universe and introduce the idea that Hard Science should always be the first choice over space fantasy unless you need to breathe in space to tell the story and then by golly go beyond our limited knowledge of physics to a galaxy far away enough to make it sound reasonable. In the meantime, I live in his dreams of hope for this cosmos and his word guide me as I ride this planet through the stars.

Is it any wonder that my heroes are almost always comedians or writers or scientists or all three.

Jon Stewart is my hero, not only is he the quintessential wit but also he is the hero in the face of this insanity that fills our media and minds with unnamed fears and unrealized lies. I need my voice in the darkness, I need my sense of irony in the sea of hypocrisy where people who are needlessly self important blather and blunder on with their own egos that they have lost the ability to stop and see how stupid and mortal they truly are.  

John Oliver is just over the top and down to earth hilarious in his pursuit of finding reason or at least reasonability in the face of such madness as we find not only in this country but also the rest of the world. Where do I find my news? Where do i look for honesty and the truth, from the mouths of men all too often dismissed as comedians and fools.

Which brings me to Stephen Colbert. The Fool of Fools who was actually anything but.

He is the Deadpool of the media world, if you don't understand that look up breaking the fourth wall and speaking the truth with a lie. He was/is the super geek that I can turn to in order to question authority and mock the rich and self important.

and that's the word.

I still need my heroes.
I want to have people I can quote as often as Shakespeare and Pope and still be amazed by most of what they do and write and say. Heroes who are true to themselves and don't waffle in the face of fear and the world. So I leave you know with Neil and Amanda (also a hero) makin' whoopie.
and that is Heroism according to Mike

Snow and Ice and Flu and Life without You, Blue.

So I had the flu. I haven't had the flu in such a long time that I am almost sure I had a dog named Blue when I last had the Flu....
No, this is not the poetry blog.

Insert a song about a dog named blue

So it snowed, well actually it rained ice. Yes, it rained ice.
It does that kind of thing around here in East Tennessee.
I am serious- well no I am never serious but it still rained ice.
then it kind of snowed basically in order to make the ice look like snow.
Oh unscrupulous ice! Like Ice in snow's clothing sneaking in to kill your kid's best friend in a seemingly legit snowball fight!

Insert video about a dog named blue.

anyway being sick sucks almost as being cold and sick and blue.

I often stop and wonder what life would have been like if you had stuck around.
I mean, I have to be honest. I know my humor can be trying and playing that song over and over again probably wore you down and the door to wherever was the only place for you to flee Jesse.

no wait, that was a song...
One the benefits of being alone, is that no one is around to see how crazy you have become.
so there you have it.
I still have the flu or something like it
There is ice with deceptive snow on it.
OH unscrupulous Snow!
I never actually had a dog named blue
I probably never really had you, either.
and that is life according to the crazy man sitting at the corner of the round table blowing the steam off his cold potato....

I would have called this the Weekly Update,but...

I am a man of constant humor and never can one say that I pass up the chance to make a joke at any expense, especially at my own expense.
I am like Robin Williams, determined to laugh when all I really feel like doing is crying for myself and the world at large.
Humor might be the best medication but for the tragic wit like myself it is my whiskey and rye.
If I can't laugh then there is not much point to getting out of bed in the morning.
If you saw me, however, you'd never think I ever laughed at all or anything.
I ain't exactly a joyful being.

Probably need to get laid.

Not surprisingly, more and more people who know me, tend to let that one slip recently.

Because the truth of life is, if you want to look happy and glow, have sex.
Frankly since I haven't ever had successful sex, i will just have to take the fuckers word for it.
(it was necessary for the joke- I am going to blame Father Rasnick for that one, first joke he ever told me involved a italian bricklayer and a reputation, ruined my innocent soul, it did)

But I digress.

I need to write more so as part of my resolutions I am going to attempt a weekly blog that is just a general ramble of things. If something comes up, I will make a special blog for that at the appropriate point.


Since it is music that makes the world go around, here is one of my all time favorite songs to start us of in a very different way:

So, Nathan and his sister Eva are recent discoveries. They aren't the best unless you count effort as part of it. I am enjoying their music right now.

So what else is new or old or otherwise?
I can't tell you, it's confidential or I have no confidence I can tell you.

There's yet another Fantastic Four movie that will explain for the the fourth time why they are fantastic. Yes, 4 times. Each time has had it's own version of suck..
Let us count the ways.
1) 1978. TV The torch was kicked in favor of a robot named herbie....fail, fail, fail. fail.
2) 1994  Roger Corman's jewel of a horribly under budget film disaster that everyone (including IMDB) has apparently agreed to ignore.
3) 2005 I had hopes for this one, but the folks at 20th century fox wanted a more modern retelling and apparently had never actually read the comic book. So, yes, another epic disaster wherein Doctor Doom, perhaps the most fearsome of all Marvel villians was reduced to a slimy, conniving asshole. Jessica Alba was hot although her powers were lamely presented and the most memorable things was her showing up naked (well mostly naked) several times. (the rise of the silver surfer was infinitely worse but it's a sequel and I am skipping it)
4) 2015 Time for  a much needed reboot they tell me, and it looks cool but they have already thown the comic book plot out the window and changed the nature (and race) of several of the characters in the standard vainglorious attempt at wider appeal. So I am predicting that it will be another fail since, apparently, no one will trust that a comic book plot is good enough for a movie.

Well, look at the time. Commercial Break!
after we come back, I will attempt to explain the Republican primaries while humming the star spangled rapsong and riding a mule backwards.
or you can take it from me that this is life according to Mike.

Well, I should have seen that one coming.

So this week, my fanpage on Facebook hit 10,000 likes with a daily post reach of 90% (roughly 9035 people interacting with the page). I am one of the few page admins, I know, who pay a lot of specific attention to the page analytics and try to keep in step with what that data suggests about the fans of my page.

The Deadpool Fool

Does this give me any credibility?

Depends on who you ask.

Mostly people are impressed until they find out what or rather who Deadpool is.

Then it's like "why would you even be associated with that?"

Because I hate football.

and baseball

and broccoli.

Broccoli? But Mike it has protein!

Sure it does, but it gives me gas.

Oh.

I mean I Fart all-

I really don't want to know, thanks.

Well you asked...

I was just saying why would you use Deadpool Fool as proof that you know how to use Facebook better than the game playing housewives and puppy posting cat lovers that spend their entire days trolling around for the cute?

I think you just answered you're own question, there, Frank.

Can I turn this formula to my blogs for instance?

I don't know, I haven't tried it yet.

having to tag blogs and make friends with other bloggers is a bit harder since finding bloggers like me has really happened yet.

maybe tomorrow.

In the meantime, it would be nice for someone to come by and recognize that I got my *&%$! together and say I think you get it Mike.

Also can you turn my knitting fan page into a page that the kids will love?

uhm. look at the time!

and that's life according to Mike

New Years Resolutions or Lies we mean to be true but probably will regret in December.

Well, it's that time again when society and your friends and family (mostly your Mum) expect you to say: 
"This year is going to be different."
which means Resolutions.

I have already got my prelim from my Mother.

So here are my New Year Resolutions.

1. Write More. Especially on Legacy of Thorns.
2. Be Happier. This will be hard- I don't want to deprive my boss his wine and cheese comments
3. Be less sad. probably won't happen, the world is filled with sadness.
4. Be more Sociable. Well we'll just have to see about it, then.
5. take up archery. I had a dream, long story but there was a woman who looked like Pepper Pots in it and no it wasn't a sex dream, get over it.
6. stop feeling guilty for not doing everything my mother suggests I do.
7. survive going back to South Africa. Hell, I might even enjoy it.
8. Lose weight without going insane in the process or eating yucky food to do it. self-explanatory
9. Write even more blogs.
10. Move out of my cottage and back into the city.

There you have it. There are probably more, but now I want to act irresponsibly and play video games

and that is the new year, so far, according to Mike.

Another Pass around the Sun is done

Time for my semi annual review of 2014 because everyone else is doing one.
but first I have some thing to confess to you who avoid facebook.
since this is the end of 2014, I have a few things to confess.
1) I am jealous of women. yep the whole lot of you.
2) I no longer crave candy. Sorry M&M's.
3) I was never in love with the Big Blue Frog. Call off Valentine's
4) I an African-American. I have it on the best authority.
5) I am not black or white or pink or blue, well I might be pink so there is that.
6) I love my brother and sisters two. I thought it was surprising at the time.
7) I have, in fact, never been in love. Unless you count Aeryn Sun and Root Beer.
8) I can't remember the last time I kissed a woman. Also, I can't remember the last time I kissed a frog. I am still trying to forget the last time I kissed a dog. I do remember the last time I kissed a man... but I swear it didn't mean anything.
9) I am only as half as crazy as most people assume me to be. Also, i am only crazy on days where I have to breath, other than that i am perfectly sane.
10) MY favorite color is red...well on good days when I can tell red from brown anyway.
11) I am going to blog about this. this is some good stuff.
12) I have 97 friends one facebook, which is good since I gained more this year than lost, and I only unfriended one person or was that 2 people? Don't ask me to name any of them. I can't remember I and I am too tired to make up their names.
and
13) because my second fav # is 13.
I do lie on occasion, mostly out of a imaginary need to impress myself into thinking that I need to know something or have been somewhere or met someone because i don't want to be that person who hasn't. Also, I lie very well when I right but these days I can't keep a straight face when I tell a lie on purpose.

Having cleared the air on all that, I have to say I feel better.

So, that was 2014, 

• I got older. I hope a little wiser and mindful to take less of life as seriously.
• I started working out 2-3 days a week and am fitter for it.
• I did not lose much weight and gained more despite giving up so much of what I had been eating
• I remembered a lot of things that might have been better that I hadn't remember because reliving them was hellacious.
• I got my father back.
• I wrote a boat load of good poetry and some awesome fiction to boot.
• I finished and published a book for a friend at a tidy profit.
• I found some new friends
• I decided to move out on my own and surprisingly my mother took it amazingly well considering I almost didn't tell her.
• I survived another election year, and decided that I might go in for being seriously non-political. It didn't work.
• I gave up soft drinks with anything other than real sugar in them which basically meant just about every softdrink.
• I learned that I am an empath and only distance keeps my safe from being drug along on other's emotional rollercoaster and that my only real defence is to push people away by being a jerk or at best be a smartass.
• I learned that I can cry and that my tears are pretty much endless.
• There is a lot of sadness in life
• I lost my dog through a series of unfortunate events.
• I realized that I am probably the most guilty man in the world only because I feel guilt nor because I really do anything wrong.
• I learned that sometimes life is just like a song.
• I also learned that much more than this is going to be boring.

and that was 2014 according to mike!

So, this is Christmas

It's Christmas Eve. around 7pm and it's raining here in Knoxville, Tennessee.
I have had a less than satisfactory mushroom and swiss Hardee's Thickburger and small fry and sip of something they called raspberry tea but wasn't. I order a Medium fry but they jipped me out of it and the sweet tea. They were about to close and they jipped me instead of just being honest.
There is so very little joy in those peoples hearts, I suspect.
The Campbells Tomato Bisque was nice though.
A beautiful woman brought me some perfume and cookies. She's married and just my friend, so you Yentas can go back to Hanukkahing.
It was a lovely and thoughtful thing for her to do.

So this is Christmas, a holiday that I have to admit has long since lost most of its meaning to me. I will not have any family over, there is no family.
well that is not completely true, I have a brother and sister-in-law in Greensboro but they are there and I am here. My father lives in West Virginia with my step mother.
I will spend sometime with my mother and try to be grateful for that.

Once upon a time, in a far away land, Christmas was different with a large seemingly happy extended family who came to our house for Christmas. The four of us, myself, my father, my brother and my mother would share a pleasant idealistic Christmas morning in front of the tree. Those days fade away like mist in the coming day and I find myself looking forward to nothing, having never known love in my own life and having to stand forever on the fringes and watch all the other people find love and family and seemingly wonderful holidays to spend them together.

I no longer ask when will it be my turn.
When will I find and fall in love?
When will I find another family?
When will Christmas hold any special meaning for me again.

There is just nothing.
This year I won't have my dog to sit with.
I will drive home after doing what I do every Christmas Eve for the last 14 years, go to bed, pretend to not be sad or mad, and silently pray that another Christmas Day goes by with no more sadness or madness and that my extended family will be calm, since they are a real mess these days.

There are no gifts. No one to give any to.
Not totally true but than little is. I want to have a certain someone to give things that hold great meaning to and receive the same so that we can say I love you without words but in those gifts as I would imagine.

I am not that bad off.
I have people who care about me.
I have a home and a car and a job and electric power.
because of all this, I do remember the homeless and distraught.
I remember those who have to live with fear.
It makes me grateful, that I can come home alone with no fear other
than the ghosts which whisper up from my past condemning  future.

It's a little bit funny and a little bit mad.
a little bit good and a little bit sad.
I am grateful for all that I get and all that
I have had, but it doesn't change the way things
are much as Christmas and I are not the best
dancing partners so far.

I hope that all of you have it better, and I feel for all of you who have it far worse than me.
I hope that Christmas brings you joy or at very least a reprieve from your troubles.
However this blog finds you, know that I am with you, if you will have me be.

good night.
Godspeed.

and that is life according to Mike