Internet Survival According to Mike (Repost)

I wrote this for some facebook friends. 
A followup to my Internet Security- not Lifelock post 
RansomWare. 
Best defense is still a good, currently paid for antivirus/internet security software package/subscription like 
Norton $39 a year, Avast, AVG, others. 
my last choice is always McAfee as it usually scores at the bottom 
or get a Mac. 
PCGamer or CNet will invariably publish a best Antivirus/Internet Security review. 
or get a Mac. 
I use Norton and have for almost 20 years. I have avoided most of the major and minor threats on the net over the years because of this decision. 
Buy the software on Amazon. It's cheaper than from the company directly. 
or get a Mac. 


Thirdly 
Some useful third party programs that can prevent, rescue, stop other infections/hacks. 
1. MalwareBytes (free but worth its weight in gold) I use this in addition to Norton on my PC 
2. CCleaner, I use this one as well on my PC as well. This one will clean your system as gently or as aggressively as anything. 
3. AdBlock, Stands adblocker (for browsers) these extensions will block page ads, clean up Facebook feeds, other social media pest, even youtube ads (if you hate them enough- I turned mine off since I understand now how much youtube creators need them). More importantly, the ad blockers will save from web page redirects (which is one way to get hit with ransomware). 


Fourthly. 
Most importantly. 
Ransomware. 
There are 4 principle ways to get hit by ransomware. 
1. Email. I call this lazy hacking. 
you get an email that appears to be from a friend (usually means they have been compromised) alway verify email addresses. The email contains some text and a mini-url link 
will look something like this 
http://ow.ly/azwa30cmEaC (this a youtube shortened url link) 
there are ways to determine a shortened url source but most of us don't have time to figure out the pattern. Generally speaking shortened URLs or Mini-URLs are created by a third party app/website for redirects.  
The short answer is NEVER NEVER NEVER click on them. 
unless your friend tells you in articulate or at least his colloquial English that he saw this and thought it was funny. 
still don't click it, though.  
if you are savvy, find get him to tell you the name of the video /website and Google it. 
many of these pages address will drop you into the ransomware directly and unless you have a very up to date internet security software guard in place (and sometimes even if you do) you're toast. 
also, never, NEVER, NEVERNEVERNEVERNEVER! open attachments that are not picture files and even then be careful anyway. there are internet security apps for your phone but even Norton's one is mostly crap. this used to be the number one infection method for viruses. So many email attachments were corrupted or just infected. I could write a book on the variety of ways this kind of disaster takes place, but I am not going to spend any more time on it. 


2. embedded (hidden) links in a seemingly or innocent website. I once almost killed the church's video pc while searching an opera page for Ave Maria media and ended up clicking on a bogus link buried in their page's code. The Ad blocker stopped it 
These are rare on Click Bait pages. 
What is a Click Bait page? 
we've all seen them. They are very common. They are the Internet Tourist Trap. 
On Twitter/Facebook they will usually be something about  
Diet/Beauty/Celeb Reveals/ Cats/ Dogs/etc. stories that someone will post with next to no comments.  
Like a Carnie vendor luring you into his crooked water gun stall, they will have just enough info to pull you to the page (outside of twitter/facebook) 
When you get there, the dead giveaway is the tons of ads 
I MEAN THE TONS OF ADS. 
I hate click bait sites. 
They farm your clicks for ad revenue. 
well, this is like a pond full of mosquitos and one very hungry piranha waiting for you to panic. 
in short, skip click-bait websites, they are bad news no matter how enticing the promised reveal is- they are bad news and the reveal is almost always not worth it. 


3. text messages. If you don't have a smartphone, you are safe by being a dinosaur (mostly) your extinct even if you still believe those artifacts still work. 
(kidding...well only half kidding) 
with today's SMS (text messages) being interactive and capable of storing data packages you can load the Ransomware without ever knowing is have it. This includes Macs and PCs that have SMS interfaces.  
if you don't believe this the average ransomware is 12 kilobytes in size, while the average picture is 10 megabytes. 
the short answer, never click on an sms with a link on your phone. or answer one that you don't know who it is from. 


4. lastly this is a collection of methods mostly out of use. 
a. someone gives you a flashdrive with it on it. 
b. someone gives you a dvdr/cdr with it on it. 
c. you download it from the net (always be sure you know what you are downloading) 
d. When streaming video, avoid unknown websites. Safe video streaming sites are youtube (there are some bogus streamers in youtube as well), vimeo, flickster, disneymovies, netflix, amazon, ultraviolet, there's another that does high rez movies. 
e. video streaming apps that promise cheap movies. 
f. free apps that promise free stuff 
g. my brother (he's despicable) 
h. porn sites (pornhub and xhamster are safe if you need to know) 
i. be choosy on accepting cookies (the website kind- sorry cookie monster, a website cookee tracks you- ad blockers put a stop to this) 
j. chat apps/programs - software can be pushed to you through them 
k. torrents (if you know what this is, get a vpn, if not just don't do it.) 
l. free phones. they exist. 
m. free games. we've all played them. just remember that most free games make money.... 
n. facebook games- the scourge of my existence. 
o. dating websites.... also very disappointing on other levels. 
p. Pizza places other than Harby's (everything else just pales by comparison) also ordering food online- all kinds of info exchanges 
q. when doing money transactions online always start with a fresh tab/window and when done close it. less chance of leaving a digital trail 
r. dump your cookies and cache. then burn it (delete it). Remember Empire Strikes Back. Vader could have avoided a lot of trouble if they had deleted theirs before jumping to hyperspace. 
s. did I mention having Internet Security Software? 
t. Inflammatory statements in social media. It can attract hackers. (reference Madonna if in doubt) 
u. Facebook quizzes. 9 out of 10 want access to your Facebook profile 
v. anything on Facebook that wants access to your profile 
w. anything that wants permission to post on Facebook for you. 
x. decaf coffee...it's a crime against nature. 
y. powdered cremora, it's a crime against coffee. 
and 
z. don't own a computer or a cellphone and live in a dead zone. or just nuke it all from orbit. 
it's the only way to be sure. 

A Friend of Mine posted a link to this on Facebook: To Fall in Love with Anyone Do This.

Today on Facebook a friend of mine (who is married with kids) posted this article/link:
To Fall in Love with Anyone, Do This.
(NYT article post)
I read through it quickly then reread it (I am a natural doubter having never actually or at least rationally been in love or at very least reciprocal love) I have now read and reread it several times.
Even as a permanent skeptic I have an achilles heel called hope.
So as part of an experiment I am going to post the 36 questions and answer them here.
I know it's one sided and that it is unlikely that anyone will do them with me- but maybe someone someday will and wonder what it would have been like to stand opposite me and gaze into my eyes... or not. But there is always hope.

There is an "app" on the nyt site @ nytimes.com/36q that will redirect your phone to it and you can do the app via browser with your desired partner. Takes about 50 minutes, fairly idiot proof.

As OKGO says "Here We go again"

1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?
Unliving (inside joke) Jesus. I hear he was great a parties also free wine and forgiveness.
Living: Neil Gaiman. He's my favorite person and very interesting. 

2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?
Moderately famous, and by that- famous for something I actually did such as being the awesome author of a great novel, never mind being a famous blogger with a quirky smile

3. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?
Always, if I am not careful I will have the entire conversation before starting it and finding out that I have forgotten or don't need all that rehearsing anyway

4. What would constitute a “perfect” day for you?
No depression. None, nada, also no sadness and a general sense of giddiness. No physical aches and pains be nice to. Sunlight, a long talk with a friend and no guilt over what I ate or failed to accomplish that day

5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?
Yesterday, pretty much sing to myself all the time. Yesterday, although they didn't take it that well.

6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?
The Body, I have seen those 90 year olds and their minds are fine but gawd the bodies aren't -ask the 90 year olds, you'll get the same answer. besides my 30 year old mind wasn't much to talk about.

7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?
Not really. I actually have no intention of having premonitions since I had a cousin who had a fear of dying in a car accident so much that he stopped driving and took a taxi and you ca guess how he died....

8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.
Since I don't have a partner or even a volunteer, I will express 3 things I would like to have in common. 
1. the need to be touched. I don't get touched much by anyone, for me there is nothing more intimate nor personal nor lovely then being touched by someone.
2. The ability and probability to find humor in everything. Even at my worst I find I would rather laugh then cry.
3. belief in love however unlikely is more than just an illusion or a lie we tell ourselves in order to not feel utterly alone. 
There is a lot more but when faced with such basic needs if I found someone who was as into scifi fantasy/reading/language/writing/music/geekdom and the like but did not have the other things in common then it would just be a cosmic joke on me. I would rather be in love with a person who had no interests in common with me but I could touch/laugh/love without pause or question than a unresponsive rock.

9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?
The list would be long.
but.
Mostly that I am smart, creative, kind, vulnerable and funny.
and that I can be more than I am now.

10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?
That my parent's had settled in a small town with a solid community and I could have grown up with kids near me that were my own age and shared my interests. That appearance/decorum was less important than compassion and forgiveness. That to appear human was better than how I dress or stood. Basically my parents did their best and I am grateful for most of it, but they weren't as good as they would have liked or as I would have liked. Very few people are that fortunate.

11. Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.
4 minutes wouldn't cover it. but here is the short short short version.
I am a South African White American who has been around the world once, lived in a few places, seen a lot of the world, survived hell and worse, been pretty much alone through the entirety of it all and inherited a lot of things from my parents I would have rather skipped instead. I have not lived much as an adult since fear and depression took over my life through my 20's and 30's. But I am better now. Also I am like an onion Donkey.

12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?
The ability to fly. Okay I just assumed it was a superpower. able to play the guitar like a pro. words and music man.

13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?
Depends on the day.
Somedays, I would like to know what happened to me that I have a mental block from remembering. Other days I hope I never remember it. 
Somedays, I would like to know if I ever will fall in love, but really I am afraid that I won't and then I would rather know- it's all about that hope.
If the Crystal Ball could tell me who i should find to fall in love with I suppose that would be both exciting and terrifying. Also if there really is a God and what is She up to. or where in the heck Holloway's key really is , I keep looking but I still can't find it and I will never beat that game.

14. Is there something that you've dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it?
Finishing my novel. Writer's block, too many excuses and distractions.
Also kissing a woman. I am a scaredy cat and lose my nerve way to often.

15. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
I hope I haven't made it yet. otherwise, realizing that I am a writer was pretty great. I did get a Master's Degree.

16. What do you value most in a friendship?
Trust. I want to trust my friends implicitly. 

17. What is your most treasured memory?
The first time I kissed Olyvya or Kim or Sophia "Boo"
meeting Larry Elmore or Neil Gaiman and having a normal discussion with them as if we were equals.
Also the day I met Felicia Day at Blizzcon and feeling connected with her for a few precious minutes.

18. What is your most terrible memory?
There are too many. Being abused by people I trusted and loved. Being bullied, hated and or feared.
I just can't go there, it's a very dark place.

19. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?
I guess I would go find someone (a woman) and kiss her and just maybe have sex. I would like to know what that actually feels like. I have fooled around and that was great but I am... still inexperienced. 45 years 11 months and counting. 
If you have to ask why then you obviously have forgotten.
fuck the bucket list, I would trade my entire life most days for just a five minute kiss. 
and that would/will change the way I am living, for the record.
if I survive the kiss and sex, then I think skydiving would be next.

20. What does friendship mean to you?
Everything, I want my friendships to last, be based on mutual trust and understanding. It's doesn't always happen, but the one thing I hate to do is let down someone I call my friend. 

21. What roles do love and affection play in your life?
Sadly not much. This happens when the only person around you is your mother. I love her and I feel affection for her BUT she is my mother not my lover and at best we are friends. I love my cat and feel affection for him. If you are my friend, I hope they feel both from me.

22. Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.
Again, not having a someone I cannot say save to say these a five characteristics- I would like in my partner should she apparate at some point.
1. innate happiness. being happy in her own skin
2. kindness
3. loves animals (well not stink bugs )
4. loves to be loved
5. smiles a lot. maybe too much. 

23. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s?
Sadly we were not that close or warm. I had a better childhood because I got to go and see things others did not, I got exposed to a lot of good things like art, music, theater and nature. BUT. my home life was not stable or safe after I turned 5. So I had a good childhood but not necessarily a happy one.

24. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?
It's better than it was and healthier than it's ever been. I stayed with her during and after the divorce. it became a matter of me and her in everything and while it helped me through college, it was a little too intimate and close for my well being. Now there is some distance and space, soon there will be more and I think I will be better for it. I hope, she will be better for it too.

25. Make three true “we” statements each. For instance, “We are both in this room feeling ... “
Verbatim.
We are probably both scared at how this might play out
We are both unlikely to be happy to go home alone.
We are both hoping that somehow someway it can/will be different this time.

26. Complete this sentence: “I wish I had someone with whom I could share ... “
I wish I had someone with whom I could share everything with or at least as much as she will be comfortable sharing with.

27. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.
I am a empath and if we are not both aware and careful of that I will take on and even reflect your own emotions back at you instead of just expressing my own.

28. Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met.
I like the way I think you will bite your lower lip when you feel shy, happy or nervous.
I like the way you open a new book as if the contents are ready to burst out.
I like the way you look at me when you think I won't notice or see
I like the way you take time to rehearse what you are going to say on the phone before calling me.
I can't honestly say that I would say all this to a stranger. But I like the way you keep nodding as if you agree with everything you just read.

29. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life.
There are so many.
It really depends on how embarrassed. I guess the worst I remember was getting an erection in science class and then having two girls I liked notice and point it out. Now that I think of it that led to some seriously bad bullying and isolation.

30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?
It's been a long time (at least a year) I usually flee as soon as I suspect it's about to happen. 
by myself, a couple of weeks ago, when you are me, it happens fairly regularly, mostly when writing blogs or poetry although I did tear up quite a bit during Big Hero 6- I got a lot of Pain.

31. Tell your partner something that you like about them already.
That you are still reading this. Also that dimple in your chin.

32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?
It's all about time and place and sensitivity. There's a time and place for everything. That being said I never laugh about abuse or abject cruelty.

33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven’t you told them yet?
Well, I guess I won't get to tell Felicia Day thanks for treating me like a normal person and I won't get to tell Nathan Fillion that he is without a doubt my favorite actor of all time, or Jake, I am the one who not only took the last beer but I only drank half of it before pouring it out in your rose bush. Sorry man. Life is full of regrets and things better left unsaid. The one thing I will regret is that I will never get a chance to do the silly walk around your house nor tell you how much I would have loved you if you had only loved me back in the first place.
hey you asked. 

34. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?
The Beach Towel - you know the one with The hitchhiker's guide to the Galaxy on it?
since my loved ones include my xbox and pc, I think that would cover it.
how is that not funny?

It's not like I am going to lug out the family photo album or that ugly couch your mother gave us.
35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?
Tori, she was so young and pretty. Everybody dies, I am disturbed by all of them. Some of the people in my family have been dying for years others might as well be dead now. 

36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.
I can't dance. What dya think?
and there you have it.
It would be really cool if you commented on this.
or told me you had fallen in love with me and it was time to meet on a bridge and spend 4 minutes staring into one another's eyes.
I feel kind of silly and foolish
but hey that's Life according to mike.