Monday, June 24, 2013

Things about CPAP's that you probably didn't want to know

Here's freebie from Facebook.
This guy reminds of Dr. Evil


As a person with Severe Sleep Apnea, let me be the first to welcome you to Hell. Well Hell might be to strong a word.
a few things you might want to consider:
1. there are several mask options depending on you issues with claustrophobia: Full face- wha
t you have , Nasal (what I have) Nasal pillow (pillow is a misnomer for nostril plugs padded by a "pillow"), nasal prong (new dual action- looks like a sci fi reject- I always think "I am the walrus" when I see these). Hybrid- for those who was plugs and mouth cover, oral (goes into yon mouth- remember to bite down now), and everyone's favorite full face (think hazmat)

what fun, Nasal
hybrid, makes me think of Bane (batman)
such bliss, minimal prong
 



 Hazmat (or full face mask)




 Hybrid, this is just scary

Major Tom to Control
 2. make sure you get a good humidifier attachment. Most Cpap are good at drying out basements ( well your body) humidifiers go a long way especially over winter.
3. Distilled water, not spring or tap. Residue in humidifier
s are a pain to clean
4. Padded straps with minimal velcro, there is nothing quite like velcro burn at 3am.
5. snuggle hose cover, if it gets under you at night you might have dreams about vacuum cleaners and cybernetic snakes.
6. I am planning on the next since the hose is a minor nightmare- where do you keep it. the best way is to have it go straight up over the back of your head like a mohawk. Strangulation and soffocation can occur regularly. Also (I need this) there are these things called hose lift system (looks like medical drip stands) that elevate the hose out of tangle range.

modern CPAP (well almost modern)
It's Mine, all mine! Although I want the one on the left.

These CPAP have humidifier attachments




Snuggle hose (snuggle bunnies!)
Snuggle Mask (snuggle bunnies!)


Okay it's not a drip stand but it could be




7. in case of skin irritation panic. Okay, use the jelly/cream/oil stuff but don't say I didn't warn you.
8. the good news is that when you sleep, you will hit REM and become 90% motionless. These crazy machine work amazingly well. I don't even take a
nap without mine. Keep them claen (wash the masks and hoses and change your air filters- don't use soap or anything that has a residue or odor)
9. Hope that your significant other is shorter than you and enjoys chest snuggling. otherwise disaster can occur.
10. Murphy's Law. Make sure (I said make sure) you place your cpap machine in a relative position equal to or below your head. Becuase if you don't when you manage to tangle the cord the last thing you need is for it to fall on your forehead at 4AM!
That's it.
when you decide you hate it, consider the alternative to cpap- that would be the old method where the cut a hole in your throat and put in a removable plug. 


This is not actually a CPAP but it could have been!

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