Trying to be a good man

Notice, that I didn't say how to be a good man.

This is a constant struggle for me since part of me- the darker side of me would tell me on long nights that it would just be easier to lie cheat and steal. not as literally as that, but taking advantage of others would have gotten me things that I would have wanted. But I took the high road always the high road I didn't take or get. People talk about sacrifice but to be a better man I gave up the company of lesser people instead looking for honesty and truth and decency and passion I end up like that crazy greek man walking around Athens in the dead of night with his dog looking for one honest man.
We all lie.
We mostly lie to ourselves.
We try to be honest, true but it is not in our natures to do so. If you are uncompromising with this you end up like me, alone. Unless, you are indeed fortunate to find someone else that deceitfulness is not a part of who they are or want to be.

I never said that I have succeeded but I have found success. I can look in the mirror and say- Mike, you are a good man- most of the time when your human nature does not get the better of you and impure thoughts take over your mind no matter how briefly.

I am a man after all.
I lust.
I want.
I hate
I get angry
I feel pride
I am arrogant
I am perfect
I am selfish

But I struggle, I yearn to be more than what is easy - far easier to be.

I am a man after all.
I take responsibility
I keep my word
I respect others- not just because they are older, women, smarter, more successful, richer
I listen and hear what others say
I do what I say I am going to do- even when it is the last thing I want to do.
I dream the impossible dream

I will be your friend
I will tell you that I love you even when it is really really hard to
I will tell you the truth even when it is easier and kinder to lie to you
I will forgive you because I want you to forgive me to

After all.
We are not perfect

The reasons I decided to do this was because a part of me loves life more than most things
For me, that is my love of God. What I see as the Universe, What I do see when I look beyond myself and see that the needs of others are great indeed.

I choose to believe as I choose to follow the teachings of the Christ that instruct me to be what I want to be.

For me it is a perfect circle.
I try to be a good man because that is what God wants me to be and because that is what I want to be.


Anyway, that's how I see it.

here's is some inspirations: The Impossible Dream